What a homecoming!

I couldn’t realize it for too long in my life how can it be that people possess apartments, houses, or even lend them but remain homeless, homeless inside begging for someone to give you shelter.

For too long I thought that home is a physical place. In the pursuit of a definition of home, I defined it as my apartment, house, city, country, and the whole world. Even though after moving to Canada, the most beautiful country in the world, I still didn’t feel at home.

Home is a feeling. It is a place where my soul feels it belongs, where I can unapologetically be myself, where I am loved for my authentic self. Home is the place where I don’t have to work hard just to be loved. This feeling makes me get control over my life and lose it. A feeling that gives me a place in a world. A feeling that proves that I finally found my own self.

Once you have built a home within yourself, you are unstoppable. Because you are no longer a walking homeless person begging for someone to give you shelter. You are not standing at every intersection and every corner begging for whatever leftovers or pocket change people have to give you.

And once you’ve built a home within yourself, you will no longer be in a reactive mode in relation to the world around you. You are not in a state of defining yourself in comparison to others. You’re not in a state of feeling good about yourself just because you feel you are better than others based on how much money you make, what your job title is or what your social status is.

In a state of at-homeness, you are not constantly knocking on other people’s doors, pointing out to them how their actions or words are wrong.

You understand that others may throw rocks at your home. Those rocks don’t mean anything about you unless you make them mean something about you. The next thing you do is turn these rocks into bricks to solidify your home. You focus on fixing the damage within your home, rather than waiting for the rock-throwers to give you permission to do so by apologizing for what they did. You also don’t focus on revenge or throwing rocks back at them. You become able to see people’s actions and words as separate from what you know and believe about yourself.

Having this chance to share with you my experience, I wish if you have not yet got acquainted with this feeling at least you know that this endeavor is achievable. Come back home now! And dock this amazing feeling.

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